Most random conversations over coffee eventually lead to relationship-related talk, is what one has figured in 2007. Fashion designer, free lance writer, brother, aspiring model, senior editor, dear friend, anonymous critique… All conversations have eventually lead to talks about men-women, status quo, marriage, money and sometimes, love and sex.If one weren't talking, umpteen researches on everything from virginity to how your boss was affecting your sex life were constantly in the news. While 2007 proved to be the Year of the Sex Research, it was also a year of candid conversations.
One wall-to-wall conversation and a fun survey brought out some interesting interesting differences between men, women and how their changing relationship with money.
M for marriage or M for money?
The only two women who have ever purely discussed money with me have been the manager of my bank (wanted me to buy a gold coin) and a life insurance agent.
Men and women think differently of money. Most women speak of money in terms of spending: Money is that which pays your bill or lets you shop or that which you can save so that you can shop later. Most men who think money, think of it big. "When I am the partner in the firm," or "when I am a millionaire" (or even marry a millionaire's daughter), it's not about immediate spending.
Women hardly talk of becoming CEOs or region heads or millionaires… Unless they are (a) very young and single (b) jilted in love thus only thinking career (c) chronically committed to single-dom/ can't find a man (d) have a family to think of; and even then the family will always take precedence over making the bucks.
A recent research announced how in a marriage, women give preference to the man's career – say if it came to changing cities and jobs – over theirs. Even when removed from the marriage situation, women were only too happy to leave the money and go for love.
A random 'survey' of 18 people – nine men, nine women, 23-30 years old, all earning well, most live away from families, diverse nationalities and occupations – proved the same. The question asked was simple: 'If it came to a choice between marrying/being with the person of my dreams and choosing the job of my dreams (minimum million USD PM), I would choose…?'
Of the 69 % chose marriage over dream job, majority were women. Of the 45 % who chose the job/ money, majority were men. The few women who chose money (or considered it) quickly pointed out how they would have chosen love if life (and men) had taught them otherwise.
Basically, women ONLY think money when there's either a he-has-left-me involved or perhaps a what-if-he-leaves-me. If at all women think of secure future, financial independence and marriage in the same sentence, women think of marrying a man who earns well (and will not leave them).
NEXT PAGE: Girls make homes and boys make money?
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